Perfectionists and People Pleasers
Perfectionist and
high achievers…
often experience feelings of shame when they do not meet their own impossible expectations. They sense that their value comes from producing exceptional results. Perfectionists come to therapy to “fix” themselves because they think surely they can figure out how to do it all.
People pleasers…
give and give of themselves. They put their own needs last and struggle to ask for help. People pleasers are on high alert monitoring every else’s moods and they are devastated if someone is mad at them. They feel that their value comes exclusively from being useful to others.
Perfectionist and people-pleasers often need the dynamic of therapy to feel they have permission to focus on themselves for an hour.
Reconstruct Your Life
There are moments in life when something stops working but nothing new has fully taken its place yet.
You might feel tired of repeating the same patterns in relationships. You might be questioning roles you’ve always inhabited, or realizing that the life you’ve built no longer feels like your own.
I work with people who are in the process of rethinking their lives. That might include exploring new ways of relating, redefining boundaries, or ending people-pleasing behaviors. This phase can feel uncertain, disorienting, and even isolating—but it can also be a powerful opportunity to build something more aligned.
In our work together, we’ll slow things down enough to understand what’s no longer working, where those patterns come from, and what it might look like to move forward in a way that feels more honest and sustainable.
What Therapy Offers
For perfectionist and people-pleasers, being in therapy offers one of the only contexts where they can fully express their frustrations, shame, challenges, and expectations. It can be a sacred place where they don’t have to perform or feel responsible for another person. The perfectionist’s needs take center stage, which can be transformational and introduces new options for their professional and personal lives.
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